Disturbed or impoverished relationships have been identified as a predominant feature of adult children of alcoholics (ACOAs). Recently, the concept of co-dependency has been advanced to depict the interpersonal difficulties of these individuals, but lacks definitional rigor.

Common to all of those who suffer from this disease are a low frustration tolerance, an exquisite sensitivity, a diminished sense of one’s own worth, and feelings of isolation that share residence in the head with an elegant set of neurochemical activities, the exact reactions that belong to the alcoholic alone.

Although it’s not uncommon to use alcohol to cope, it isn’t a healthy coping strategy. Coping with alcohol can increase anxiety symptoms due to the constant pursuit of relaxation felt when buzzed. It causes a disconnection between your mind, body, and spirit, which may leave you feeling more in pain than before.

Depression and anxiety. Frequent outbursts and erratic behaviors (which stems from the inability to clearly see and understand the world around them or properly process the behavior of others or relationships) Poor self-image and self-hatred.

The four child/adult attachment styles are:

• Secure – autonomous;
• Avoidant – dismissing;
• Anxious – preoccupied; and.
• Disorganized – unresolved.

When you’re struggling with alcohol cravings, try these strategies: Talk to someone you trust: your sponsor, a supportive family member or friend, or someone from your faith community. Distract yourself until the urge passes. Go for a walk, listen to music, do some housecleaning, run an errand, or tackle a quick task.

Possible symptoms of the disorder in adults include:

• difficulty reading emotions.
• resistance to affection.
• difficulty showing affection.
• low levels of trust.
• difficulty maintaining relationships.
• a negative self-image.
• anger issues.
• impulsivity.

They may have abused alcohol and drugs in the beginning because they lacked the confidence to meet new people. When they become sober, they can once again struggle with shyness. It can also be harder to meet people because they no longer go to bars. Sober people most definitely can find romance in recovery but they can benefit from a new approach.

The sibling relationship is unique, and when one sibling is addicted, it often brings with it alliances, violations of trust, secrets, hurt, fear, sadness,or resentments. Siblings have been ignored, hurt, manipulated or used by their using sibling.

Occasionally, members of AA do form successful romantic relationships, but this is when they are both secure in their sobriety. People in sobriety can find romantic relationships to be their hardest challenge. They may have abused alcohol and drugs in the beginning because they lacked the confidence to meet new people.

Medically Reviewed By: Lauren Guilbeault Developing or sustaining a relationship with a diagnosed alcoholic may not always be easy, however you are not alone, and neither are they. Alcoholism and addiction recovery are a process that you need to support yourself in, as well.